【Watch Sexy urban legends season 1 episode 8】

Hello. My name is Watch Sexy urban legends season 1 episode 8Henry P. Twolingos and I am the CEO of Duolingo, and I'm here to discuss Duolingo's questionable push notifications.

I understand that learning a language on your own can be difficult, and requires various forms of support from outside sources in order to achieve your goal. That's why we at Duolingo stand by our decision to make our push notifications passive aggressive. Because if our passive aggressive push notifications don't make you learn French, then I don't know what will, so really, we're all you have.

SEE ALSO: Will this list of sexual cartoon bees finally convince you to start applying for jobs?

Do you remember in high school when your mom would say "I think your legs looked better when you were running track," or "I think your arms looked better when you were running track"? Didn't that make you try out for another season of track though it contributed to your personal struggle with self-esteem? Maybe that was just my mom, but hey, now my legs look fantastic. And just as my legs look fantastic, so your brains can SPEAK fantastically.

You get it.

We have tried everything. At first, our notifications were nice. Something like, "Hey! Friendly reminder to practice French today!" With these notifications, statistics showed that we users dropped after about one week. In order to ramp it up, we tried mean notifications, which included messages such as, "Hey dickhead, why don't you get off your lazy ass and do your goddamn French lesson?" In hindsight, we could have used less bad language, and users began dropping after an average of one day.

Mashable Light Speed Want more out-of-this world tech, space and science stories? Sign up for Mashable's weekly Light Speed newsletter. By clicking Sign Me Up, you confirm you are 16+ and agree to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. Thanks for signing up!

But then, we thought of passive aggressive notifications: a reasonable balance between nice and mean that reminds you to practice French with a subtle dig to your psyche that makes you feel like you're spiting us by completing a lesson. Now users last an average of three weeks, and after that, the data shows that we can't save them.

Bottom line is, subtly insulting you into learning a language on your own is the best we got, so cut us some slack.

Passive aggressive notifications work particularly well when users aren't responding to our daily reminders. When this happens, we send a passive aggressive alert that we will no longer be sending passive aggressive notifications. What could be more passive aggressive than that?

Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

I remember the days when mankind worked diligently to accomplish things. Is it the advance of technology that has doomed citizens? That by having so much knowledge at the touch of a button, you never feel the need to truly learn things? Why can't you people just finish something you started?

I guess what I'm saying is, if you really wanted or needed to learn a language, you would learn it yourself.

Thanks for reading Mashable Humor: original comedy every day. Or most days. We're people, just like you, and we're trying our best.

---

Featured Video For You

---

Seinfeld with hamsters

---

• Science
• Entertainment
• Social Good
• Digital Culture
• Shopping
• Games
• Deals
• Life

• Today's Hurdle hints and answers for April 23, 2025
• Anthony Hopkins did a weird dance on Twitter and it's glorious
• In praise of YouTubers who don't say a word
• Spotify launches Netflix Hub with official soundtracks from Netflix shows
• Against Fear
• South Korea will use VR to assess whether elderly drivers can get a license
• 10 people who brought cardboard cutout dates to prom
• Twitter thinks it's solved the case of who threatened Stormy Daniels
• NYT mini crossword answers for April 24, 2025
• How to turn your iPhone into a magnifying glass

• The cult of pumpkin spice is so strong that it brought down an entire school in the US
• Photographer dangles models off a 30
• MashReads Podcast: Getting nostalgic over hope and change with former Obama speechwriter David Litt
• How to downgrade your iPhone from iOS 11
• 'Game of Thrones' star Nathalie Emmanuel posts anti
• McDonald's relents to rabid 'Rick and Morty' fans, promises more Szechuan sauce
• Cam Newton has apologized for his degrading and sexist comment toward women
• Season 8 of 'Game of Thrones' will begin production on Sunday
• Friends don't let friends go apple picking
• Halloween costume ideas for couples who are about to break up

• Keeping Hope Alive
• Twitter Safety adds new rules that ban "private media"
• This Elsonic vertical monitor is just for scrolling through social media
• TikTok and U.N. Women launch in
• 4GHz CPU Battle: AMD 2nd
• Facebook, let me unlike this
• Instagram blogger Photoshops her body to look how trolls want it to look
• 15 best cartoons on Hulu for animation fans
• What's Thermal Throttling and How to Prevent It
• Partially blind elderly dog helped rescue lost three

• Anker raises Amazon prices amid US tariffs
• Twitch's new Suspicious User Detection tool aims to stop ban evasion
• Chadwick Boseman is bringing Wakanda to his alma mater — Howard University
• Samsung Galaxy A13 offers 5G on the cheap
• NYT mini crossword answers for May 12, 2025
• Busy hockey mom Sarah Palin is an Instagram influencer now
• The only student to walk out for gun control last month rallied his classmates for Columbine
• Twitter Safety adds new rules that ban "private media"
• Better Buy: Previous
• Freeform and 'Nightline' team up for Parkland shooting documentary